Thursday, October 20, 2011

Um, Tim…

What? Who's that?

"I'm Ted. I'm some random imaginary person you just made up a few seconds ago."

Oh, really.

"Yes, really."


Alright, Ted. What brings you here?

"Well, I wanted to ask you some very important question."


Um, ok. What's that question?

"Hmm… I need to reword it so it sounds better."


Ted, you don't need to. I can…

"Hey, I'm trying to concentrate here."


But…

"No BUTS! This question must be articulated so that it flows like soft velvet, swaying through a gentle breeze…"


*sigh*

"…casting a ray of tranquility, flowing up to your heart in serenity…"


Grrr.

"…that reveals a glimpse of paradise, a view so beautiful that…"


OH SHUT UP!


"Hold on, Mr. Impatient! The words are not in harmony yet."


I DON'T CARE ABOUT THAT! JUST GIVE ME THE QUESTION ALREADY!!!

"The version that's not articulated?"


*moan* Yes, the version that's not articulated.

"Alright, alright! *growls* The question is…


WHY THE HECK DO YOU UPDATE A BLOG THAT NO ONE EVEN READS OR CARES ABOUT ANYWAY?!"

Um, well, it's hard to explain…

"I don't care if it's hard to explain! Give me the reason, NOW!"

Well, how about if I give you, um, a deal?

"WHAT deal?"

How about if I spend time rewording the answer so it articulates better?

"And the CATCH?"

The catch is, you'll have to wait.

"GRRR! Waiting is stupid! I want, I want, I want…"

Now look who's Mr. Impatient?

"FINE! I'll WAIT for the reason. But you gotta make it SNAPPY. OR ELSE…"

Or else what?

"Or else…er…I'll find out."

O-kay…

"And no trying to get away with it!" *leaves*

This screenplay was brought to you by the Audience Tab.

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